Be Gentle With Yourself!
There are days when we do better than others. Especially when it comes to healing, processing, or even writing. We are currently working on our second book, Imperfections, which we hope to release very soon. However, it is taking a bit longer than expected. Which is frustrating for us, and I am sure also frustrating for those anticipating the books release.
The first book, Finding Safety, did not take as long to write. We had this story in our head, sat down and pretty much hammered it out in a few months time. The story we write, although fiction, is inspired by our life and events. One would think this would be easy to write since we use ourselves as inspiration.
On the contrary. Our book (story) deals with the subjects of trauma and abuse. We do not shy away from the difficult topics. We expose, discuss, and watch our characters deal with the effects of physical, emotional, mental, and sexual abuse. Thus the reason it is difficult to write at times.
There are times when we write a chapter, or even a conversation, which triggers something inside of us. It makes it harder to keep writing. We need to pace ourselves. Take a step back. Turn off the computer. Take a walk, breathe, and take care of ourselves. Sometimes the best self-care is to walk away from the computer and from the story. After all, we are still healing ourselves.
For us, healing will take a lifetime. It’s a process. I’m not saying that we will never be “better”, what I am saying is that there will always be triggers, and we will always be a survivor, we will always need to process new memories as they come up or we learn about them. It’s an on-going process. And every step of our journey will depend taking care of ourselves so that we can not only survive but learn to thrive.
When we get frustrated for not finishing the book yet (which happens a lot) we have to take a step back and remember this is a process, not a race. Rome wasn’t built in a day after all…
A. G. Ballard